Cowboys and Folk Tales
by Katers
Summary: I like folk tales. I like Cowboy Bebop. Let's see if they mix, shall we? At least in their dreams they might...
1. Spike O'Lantern

A.N: Who doesn't love fairy tales? Seriously, who?  
  
Disclaimer: I do NOT own Cowboy Bebop or any of its characters, ideas, yadda yadda yadda..  
  
~~On the Bebop~~  
  
Docking peacefully at a fueling station on Mars, the Bebop, with its slightly rusted hull and splotchy paint job, rocked to and fro with each gentle lap of the harbor's waves. Gulls cried out as they circled above the blue-green water and the air smelled of salt and fish. It wasn't exactly a bed of roses, which was why Spike remained inside the ship.  
  
A green tuft of hair poked out from around the corner as mismatched brown eyes peered hesitantly into the lounge room. After scrutinizing the kitchen doorway, the hallway entrance, and the table that sat in the room's center, Spike stepped calmly in the empty room and plopped down on the faded orange sofa. ..::Peace at last::.. he thought as he snatched up the pack of cigarettes on the table.  
  
Jet had mentioned taking a break for a day or two; so of course, Faye was gone with her money. Or so Spike hopefully prayed. He hadn't seen or heard from her in two hours, and he was glad to keep it that way. Jet was out getting more supplies and had apparently taken Ed with him. ..::No objections here::.. Spike leaned back with one arm behind his head had he took a long drag from his cigarette. Letting out a long breath his eyes drifted to the ceiling fan as it twirled around and around. The smoke swirling apart like paint strokes on a canvas as it floated up to the spinning blades.  
  
..::So quiet, you could hear a pin drop::.. Spike lay there for another moment before sighing and sitting up.  
  
..::Too damn quiet::..  
  
He sighed again and smothered his cigarette in the ash tray and gazed about the still room.  
  
..::Damn::.. he thought ..::Boredom always hides best in silence. I knew I wasn't alone in here::..  
  
He leaned back again and stretched his long legs out propping them up the table. A thunk from the other side brought him from his relaxed position. Peering over the table top, Spike found a book, now open, lying on the floor. He leaned over the table and plucked the book from its resting place and studied the picture that it had fallen to. The picture was of a man holding a long stick over his shoulder with a light hung and burning dimly on the end. A title was over the paragraphs on the left side with the words "Jack O'Lantern."  
  
Spike's brow furrowed as he flipped the book to its cover keeping that page with his thumb. The cover read "An Illustrated Treasury of Fairy and Folk Tales." Opening the book back to the "Jack O'Lantern page, Spike settled himself back down on the worn and faded sofa and began reading.  
  
...::There once was a tinker of Ballingary down in County Limerick in Ireland...::..  
  
Spike's eyes roamed over the words and pictures as he turned to each new page of the story. As he came closer and closer to the end, his eyes began to droop..  
  
..::He was to have no rest, but wander over bogs, swamps, moors, and lonely places, leading folks astray..Folk know him now as Jack O'Lantern::..  
  
The last lines of the story floated away from Spike's mind as he lay back resting his head on the sofa's plush arm. The book fell across his chest and his eyes closed to welcome sleep brought on by the stealthy control of silence.  
  
~*~*~Upon waking, Spike found himself on a thinly padded cot in a small room. Gazing about lazily, he found a undersized fireplace in the wall were his feet pointed, a tattered rug lay in the middle of the floor, and a wooden clock hung on the wall opposite the bed. Next to the head of the bed was a worn and chipped rocking chair. Spike slowly brought his feet to the floor as he sat up and scratched the hank of green fluff on his head.  
  
As foreign as his settings were to him, Spike didn't feel afraid or uncomfortable. He felt at home in a sense. He rose up from the bed and strode over to the petite, circular window next to the door and peered out. A field of lush green flowed out before him, mountains of an emerald hue rolled in the distance, and a tall leafy tree grew in the front yard ripe with apples.  
  
Spike scratched his head again, rubbed his eyes, and took another look outside. Nope, lush field still there. He shrugged inwardly and took hold of the knob and opened the door stepping out into the cleanest, coolest air he'd ever had the privilege of breathing. It took his smoker's lungs by surprise and he almost gasped. Passing by the apple tree, a wood pile, and an old cart missing a wheel, Spike headed down the front path to a chopping block next to which and axe was propped.  
  
Having seen the nearly depleted firewood stock next to the house, Spike took it upon himself to replenish it. He picked up one wood block, set it on the stump and brought the axe down onto its middle splitting it cleanly in two. Pleased with himself, he tried another. The sun passed over head as Spike continued with his work until he suddenly heard a dry, wobbly voice call from his side:  
  
"Do you think you could spare us a cup of water and a seat to rest our weary bones?"  
  
Spike turned to find a feeble, old man bent with age. He had dirty brown hair and a scraggly brown beard and wore a beaten yellow shirt. To the man's right and left were two other men of the same condition.  
  
Done looking them over and seeing no harm in helping, Spike shrugged, "Sure, come on in."  
  
He led them up the front walk and let them inside. Spike brought up the rocking chair and three other wooden stools from the back room. He then went out back to the water pump and filled the pail.  
  
The four sat in a circle around the rug, Spike rocking in his rocking chair, the three old men sipping at their water. When finished, the first man said, "You have been quite kind to us."  
  
"In times like these, with so many unsavory folk, it is hard to find those who care for someone other than themselves," a second murmured; his shaggy gray hair fell over his brow.  
  
"Indeed," agreed the third, "You deserve a reward for you generosity."  
  
Spike quirked an eyebrow, "What kind of reward?"  
  
The three men glanced at each other before the first said, "We each will grant you one wish."  
  
"One wish?"  
  
"Well, three all together."  
  
"Yeah, I can count." Spike paused, "Anything I want?"  
  
The men nodded.  
  
Spike leaned back in his rocking chair and pondered it over. He rocked to and fro to, fro before he got an idea.  
  
"This chair is my favorite. It is the one I am most comfortable sitting in," He looked up at the three men, "I wish that whomever else sits in this chair gets stuck in it and can't get up until I say so."  
  
Three pairs of eyes widened. Two looked at the first man who then became solemn, "As you wish."  
  
The two others returned their gaze to Spike who was currently studying his apple tree swaying gently in the breeze in the front yard. He then leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees with his hands clasped together, "You see that apple tree?"  
  
The men nodded.  
  
"You said so yourselves that these times are full of 'unsavory folk'. I don't want people coming to steal my apples when I am poor enough as it is. I wish that whoever else touches my tree gets stuck to it and won't be able to let go until I say so. In fact, I want the branches to grab hold of them and shake 'em real hard."  
  
The gray haired man sighed, "You're wish is granted."  
  
Spike leaned back and fell into pondering once again; his eyes roamed the ceiling as if inspiration lay in its swirling wood patterns. Finally he said, "I also don't need anyone stealing my tools. I wish that if anyone other than me touches my axe, that it will rise up and chop them until I tell it to stop."  
  
Needless to say, the three men were astonished and appalled by such a request; this coming from a man who had just shown them such kind hospitality. But a promise was a promise, and Spike had made his final wish.  
  
"Granted," the third man muttered.  
  
With that, the three men rose from their stools and mumbled their thanks for the rest and water as they quietly exited the cabin. Spike continued rocking for awhile after that with a glimmer of a smile played on his lips. It was at about dusk; the sun fell behind the rolling, emerald mountains, the field's lush green became a dark violet; Spike eyes had begun to close when there came a sharp knock at the door. He rose slowly and proceeded across the room to answer it. As he peered around the door into the dark, he found a man of similar years standing on the front stoop. His hair was short and gray, his eyes were an icy blue, and he wore all black.  
  
Though his mouth curved in a smiled and held good intent, his eyes told otherwise.  
  
"I have come from far away to see you."  
  
"Have you now?" Spike kept a wary eye on him and his tone guarded.  
  
"Yes, I have heard rumors that there is a man in this land with a more wicked mind than I, and I wish to met such a man; one who feels he has the means to challenge me."  
  
Spike's eyes narrowed, "Oh, really? And who might you be?"  
  
The man's smile broadened as he offered his hand, "Why, the Devil, of course."  
  
Spike could help but raise and eyebrow. But one look at him and he knew he wasn't kidding. Nonetheless, Spike shook his hand and allowed him inside.  
  
While the Devil remained near the door, Spike went over to the fireplace and built up a small fire. Stoking the flames, he asked over his shoulder, "What makes you think I am more evil than you?"  
  
The Devil shrugged nonchalantly as he paced to the other side of the room, "I hear you were given three wishes. And though I do not know what they were, I do know you made them with a more violent purpose in mind than of greed or even selflessness like most would. Rumors have spread. Rumors that your power rivals that of mine."  
  
Spike mumbled, "Word seems to travel fast around here."  
  
He stood and brushed his hands off on his pants. Turning back to the Devil he asked, "So why did you come? Jealous?"  
  
Spike could see him bristle at the accusation. The Devil's eyes narrowed and his aura became as red as hot coals, "I would NEVER acquire such a HUMAN trait!" Realizing his temper, he quickly regained his composure and continued calmly, "I simply come to give you an offer."  
  
The fire sparked and Spike glanced at it, "Offer of what?"  
  
"A place in my kingdom," Spike almost choked when he heard this, "As surprising as it may sound, good help IS hard to find these days."  
  
Spike went to get a drink from the water pail. The Devil pressed on, "I believe we would be good comrades. Interested?"  
  
After taking a long gulp of the cool liquid, Spike questioned, "What if I refuse?"  
  
"Then you go to Hell anyway," the Devil said with a clipped tone, "Only, you won't have my partnership."  
  
"Decisions, decisions," Spike muttered.  
  
Glancing around the room, his eyes fell on his rocking chair. Finishing off the water in his cup he said, "Well, all right. I see no harm in going. But I would like to pack some things."  
  
"You won't need any earthly possessions, trust me."  
  
"All the same, I would still like to take one last look around my home as small and pathetic as it is. In fact, why don't you just sit down in my favorite rocking chair while I get my things on order?"  
  
The Devil's eyes lingered on him and for a fleeting moment Spike thought he caught on. But then the Devil replied, "All right, you have five minutes." And he sat down in the chair.  
  
Spike then walked over to the fire and began heating one of the pokers over the flames. The Devil kept a wary eye on him until finally, as the barbed end of iron began to glow red, he called out, "What are you doing?"  
  
A feral grin spread across Spike's mouth as he pulled the poker out and held it before him, "You think I would actually join with the likes of you?" The Devil began to squirm in the chair as Spike pointed the glowing end towards him.  
  
"Stop it! Get that away from me!" The Devil tried desperately to get out of the chair, but he was stuck fast. "Stop! I promise I'll leave! Just keep that away from me!"  
  
Spike inched the poker closer and closer to the Devil's eye until he was only centimeters away. But he stopped and lowered it, "You will leave my property?"  
  
"Yes, I will leave! Make this chair let go!"  
  
Spike placed the poker back against the brick of the fireplace then ordered the chair, "Let him go!"  
  
The Devil sprang up as if he had been burned and shuffled to the door keeping his eye on Spike. Through gritted teeth he growled, "You'll be lucky if I don't burn this whole house down."  
  
He opened the door and began to step out, but Spike wasn't done with him yet. He called after him, "I suppose that WAS a little unfair. I mean, to catch you by surprise like that."  
  
The Devil turned back to him and Spike continued, "How about we make a bet? And this one is so simple it should be too easy for you to win because you're a lot stronger than I am."  
  
The Devil's eyes narrowed and he murmured, "Go on."  
  
Running his fingers through his fluffy hair, Spike said, "You see my apple tree out front?"  
  
The Devil's eyes darted to the tree then back to Spike. He nodded.  
  
"If you can shake more apples out of that tree than me, I will go with you. You can't touch the apples; you can only touch the trunk of the tree."  
  
The Devil pondered the bet over for a moment before agreeing.  
  
Stepping out into the cool night air, the two walked over the tree's base.  
  
"You go first," the Devil murmured.  
  
Spike shrugged and took hold of the trunk, its fairly smooth bark crumbled under his palms. Giving the tree several good shakes, he managed to only bring down one apple.  
  
Stepping back he gave an exasperated sigh, "Well, that shouldn't be hard for you to beat."  
  
The Devil humphed and stepped up to the tree. As he took hold of the trunk, the branches reached down and grabbed him. They pulled him high up and shook him like a maraca. He screamed for help but Spike was so doubled over with laughter that he could barely speak. After a good minute of thrashing, Spike finally ordered the tree to drop the Devil. The prince of darkness not only had a battered and bruised body, his pride wasn't doing so well either. Spike fell into his fits of laughter again and he had to sit down.  
  
The Devil spied the axe leaning against the chopping block. He stormed over and snatched it up, but before he could chop off Spike's head, the axe shot out of his grip and came down hard on his shoulder. The Devil screamed in surprise if not for the pain. Spike stopped laughing long enough to watch the Devil pull the axe out of his shoulder which it then came down on his leg.  
  
Laughter claimed him again and Spike fell onto his back as the Devil torn open a portal to Hell and disappeared sealing the hole after him. Spike eventually regained his composure and wiped the tears from his eyes. As he sat up, the sun began to creep up over the hills and spread its warmth out like a blanket. Spike stood and brushed the dirt and grass off of himself and headed inside.  
  
~~``~~``~  
  
Time passed quickly yet it seemed in slow motion. Spike began to feel his age increasing as he became less and less able to move about. Lying on his deathbed, his breaths became shallower and shallower as his eyes closed. His old wrinkled hands rested on his ribs.  
  
Spike next found himself facing a long stairway with a bright light glowing at the top. He had begun his ascent when a croaky voice called out to him, "Hey, you know this is the stairway to heaven, right?"  
  
Spike turned his eyes to the stair in front of him where there sat a little green toad. His brow wrinkled as he responded, "Yeah, so?"  
  
"You can't come here! You were evil in life! You wasted your wishes on things that could only hurt others."  
  
Spike stood there with his hands in his pockets. The two stared at each other for a moment before Spike turned around, "Fine," he mumbled, and headed down the stairs, adding under his breath, "Lousy, obnoxious frog."  
  
And he continued down the stairs whistling an easy tune until he came to a fiery red door. Seeing no other place for him to go, Spike shrugged and knocked on the hot iron. From the other side he heard a familiar voice yell, "Go away! You can't come in here! I can't have someone getting the better of me in my own domain!"  
  
Spike breathed a frustrated sigh as he threw up his hands, "Then just where am I supposed to go then?!"  
  
The door opened a crack and icy blue eyes peered out at him. They scrutinized him for a moment before a chunk of flaming coal was tossed out and landed at his feet.  
  
"Take that. At least then you'll have SOME heat, though I doubt it will warm that cold heart of yours."  
  
Spike rolled his eyes, but picked up the coal nonetheless and found it only mildly warm to the touch. He eventually made it back to his cabin, though he was too restless to stay. He put the coal into a lantern and attached that to a stick which he carried over his shoulder to light his way as he traveled endlessly through limbo for eternity.~*~*~*  
  
Spike woke from his dream with a start. The book of fairy tales still rested on his chest. Lifting it up to his eyes, Spike studied the picture of 'Jack O'Lantern'. It was a man cloaked in black, his eyes hidden and his posture sullen. The drawing made Spike shiver so he slammed the book shut and tossed it back onto the table.  
  
Pulling out and lighting another cigarette, he stood and left the room.  
  
..::Leave it to Ed to leave her stuff lying around::.. he thought, though he had to admit to never seeing Ed actually reading a physical book before...  
  
A.N.: Eh, weird. Anyway, that was just Spike. I have much more in store for that little book and the other characters. (By the way, it IS an actual book I've had since as far back as I can remember. Try and find it if you can.. If they still make it.. Probably not.)  
  
:P 


	2. Faye Tells a Bedtime Story

A.N.: Aww, Ry. You make me feel all warm and gooshy inside from just one review... Odd. But anyway, thanks a bunch. Yeah, I changed my name due to new originality rules over at FictionPress. So now it is my friend's nickname for me. (It was either that or my mom's "Shuggamie".) And by the by (and to anyone else who happens to read this) Have you seen the CB movie? I want to see it SO bad. My parents offered to buy tickets but I am hesitant. It is rated R, I think, and I don't want my parents to watch that kind of violence..(listen to me, I'm being such a mommy). But I do need a parent in order to get in just the same..What a dilemma.  
  
Disclaimer: Nuthin's changed. And I am sad. But then the gremlins play hopscotch and I am filled with mirth.  
  
Oh, and a P.S and then I'll shut up: The characters may be OOC, but not because I need them to be in order for them to fit the tales. I am just not that good of a writer. :P  
  
~~Aboard the Bebop somewhere in space between Callisto and Io..Or some cool moon stuff like that~~~  
  
"Hot dogs and horseshoes, THUMP THUMP THUMP!" A blur of brown and red flew past Faye who had previously been sitting in comfortable quiet in the early hours of "morning" in space.  
  
She brushed her now wayward hair from her eyes just in time to see Ed running into the kitchen with a yapping Ein close behind. A moment later, a loud crash came from the other room followed quickly by squeals of surprise.  
  
..::So much for sleep::.. Faye rolled her eyes and hoisted herself up to go see just how much the damage would cost.  
  
Leaning against the door frame with half closed eyelids, Faye yawned, "What are you doing, Ed? It's too late for this kind of stuff."  
  
Her eyes widened slightly as she observed the whole pot rack arranged nicely all over the linoleum. She glared at the thirteen year old who sat innocently in the sink (that's right, IN the sink) holding an astonished Ein in a gentle but firm grip.  
  
The girl's watery eyes glittered as she opened her mouth to give and explanation, but Faye held up her hand, "That's okay. Just clean this up before Jet sees it. Then it's time for bed."  
  
Ed showed her unsurprising dismay with a little whimper, "But Edward isn't tired."  
  
"I don't care, I am."  
  
"But Faye-Faye-"  
  
"No but's. To bed!"  
  
Ed hung her head dejectedly for a moment before perking right back up, "Read Edward a bedtime story!"  
  
"A what?" Faye could barely ask before Ed leapt off the counter, set Ein down, and ran to the lounge. Seconds later, she was back with a thick book clutched to her chest.  
  
"From here! From here!" Ed shoved the book up to Faye's eye level only centimeters from her actual eye and few more from being up her nose.  
  
A surprised Faye pushed it back a bit in order to read the cover properly:  
  
"An Illustrated Treasury of Fairy and Folk Tales." Faye glanced around the book at Ed, "This is what you want me to read?"  
  
Ed gave vigorous nods. Taking the book, Faye sighed, "All right then. One story, then bed. And you have to clean all this up first." She, of course, was referring to the piles of cookware currently decorating the floor.  
  
Ed gave a whoop and enthusiastically set about to her task. Faye shook her head and headed towards Ed's room. As she flipped through a few pages of the book, she vaguely heard Ed ordering Ein to quickly patch the holes in the hull against a hoard of invading enemy popsicles.  
  
~~``~~``~~  
  
Ed sailed through the air and dived bombed onto the springy mattress with a zoom and a boom and Ein followed after she settled down. Faye pulled up a chair, set the book on her crossed leg, and opened to a random page. The picture that met her gaze was that of a beautiful woman with an icy blue pallor and blue hair. Snow crystals were decorating the borders of that page. Flowers that grew on garlands next to the border were slowly becoming frozen in ice. Something about the picture captured Faye's attention.  
  
Her eyes breezed over the title: The Snow Queen. Studying the woman again, Faye could see this woman was a kind of dangerous beautiful and she couldn't look away. Glancing over at Ed who lay patiently with her head on her pillow and Ein trapped neatly in the crook of her arm; her eyes fixed intently on Faye.  
  
Clearing her throat, Faye said, "How about The Snow Queen?"  
  
"Super keen, jelly-bean!" Ed gave a toothy smile and hugged Ein closer.  
  
Taking a deep breath, Faye began:  
  
"In the great Danish city of Copenhagen there once lived two poor children whose garden was no more than several flower pots of roses."  
  
..::Oh, this sounds interesting::.. Faye grumbled inwardly, wondering how long the story really was.  
  
"The boy's name was Kai and the girl's name was Gerda. Everyday, Kai and Gerda would talk and pass many a delightful hour. They had become good friends over the years.  
  
"One day in winter, Kai and Gerda were sitting together inside looking at pictures when suddenly Kai shouted, 'Ouch, something's in my eye!'  
  
"Gerda looked carefully for the object, but found nothing. 'I think it's gone now.' Kai said, but it had not. Truthfully, he had been struck by two glass splinters from the Devil's mirror. And evil magician had shattered the mirror sending shards no bigger than a grain of sand flying in all directions. When one enters the eye, it makes them see things back to front: they saw only ugliness in beauty and good in evil. Anyone unlucky enough to receive a splinter in the heart would eventually be consumed by coldness as their hearts turned to ice.  
  
"And Kai had one in both heart and eye and would soon find fault in all that was good."  
  
Ed gasped and her eyes glimmered with anticipation.  
  
"Kai was soon overcome by the shards and he began to tease poor Gerda and made her cry. Leaving her in tears, he went out to the streets to play with the city boys without so much as an apology.  
  
"As he was climbing up a snowy hill pulling his sled along behind, he looked up to see a woman dressed in blue furs staring down at him. Her eyes gleamed like two bright stars.  
  
"'Are you cold?' she asked him as she stepped closer. With a kiss to his brow, she sent icy chills to his heart which was all but frozen from the shard. Soon he was under her spell. And when she offered him to come back with her to her palace, he couldn't help but say yes.  
  
"Gerda waited for Kai's return but she never saw him again. She had no idea that he had fallen under the seductive spell of the Snow Queen.  
  
"Gerda knew that Kai was still out there somewhere, so she kissed her grandmother good-bye and set out to find him."  
  
Faye paused finding this story similar to feelings she had felt before. Maybe even still felt. Slowly, the characters of the story took on new appearances in her mind's eye. Gerda had short dark hair and Kai had fuzzy green. And the Snow Queen? Well, her beauty still remained a mystery, the likes of which Faye had never witnesses before. Suddenly she felt like she was doing more than reading a story. She mentally was cheering Gerda on.  
  
Faye swallowed and continued, seeing that Ed was still wide eyed and waiting.  
  
"Gerda came to a river where she found a boat. 'Maybe the river will take me to Kai,' she thought, so she climbed in and let the current take her. Down the way, she met an old lady wearing a wide-brimmed hat covered with flowers of every kind. She also carried a wooden cane.  
  
"Gerda was a bit afraid of the woman at first, but came to trust her as she told her of her mission. The old woman was sympathetic but secretly wished Gerda to stay with her forever. She had the means too since she was a sorceress. She indeed did keep Gerda there for almost a year using her spells to make Gerda forget. But one day Gerda saw the roses in the garden and remembered the rose garden back home thus reminding her of Kai. She quickly ran from there and hurriedly continued on since so much time had passed."  
  
Ed openly yawned and Faye had to stifle one herself. Shaking herself awake Faye went on:  
  
"She learned from a wise old mystic woman who lived in the middle of a valley that the only way to save Spi-Kai, was to remove the evil splinters from his heart and eye. Otherwise, he would continue to believe the Snow Queen's palace was the best place in the world. The woman told Gerda that she alone possessed the power to save Kai because she had the power of a loving heart to guide her. On the back of a mighty reindeer, Gerda rode to the Snow Queen's palace that was lit by the Northern Lights."  
  
Faye looked up and saw that Ed was fast asleep along with Ein who really had no choice since he couldn't move from her grip. Despite the fact her job was done, Faye stood and headed to the lounge continuing to read the story. She had to know if Gerda defeated the Snow Queen and proclaimed her love for Spi-Kai... Faye couldn't figure out why she kept slipping like that. Or she just wouldn't admit it.  
  
Sitting softly down, on the orange sofa, Faye's eyes remained locked on the words.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
'The snow drove hard, and she lost her way more than once until she finally reached the grand Ice Palace. Spi-Kai-'  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Faye stopped and glanced around the room. No one there.  
  
..::Aww, hell, who's gonna know but me?::.. And she went back to the story; no longer stopping herself from "making a few adjustments".  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
'Spike was so cold his skin was practically black. But he didn't feel it. He felt no pain as long as he was near the beautiful and powerful Snow Queen Julia. In the ice crystals, he would make majestic mosaics and sometimes spell out words. There was only one word he could never seem to be able to spell:  
  
ETERNITY  
  
The Queen promised him that if he could spell that one word, she would grant him his freedom, but he never could do it.  
  
One day, the Queen announced, 'I am going to visit my cooking pots [her volcanoes] and whiten them a bit with frosty caps.'  
  
She left Spike to himself alone with his struggle to spell the word that would grant him his freedom. It was right after the Queen left that the magnificently marvelous fantastical Faye made her way into the great hall. There she saw Spike and ran to him.  
  
'Spike! You are alive! I knew I would find you!' Her tears fell on the cold unfeeling Spike and seeped to his heart where they melted away the evil shard and ice. When he saw her, he too cried for joy and his tears washed the splinter from his eye. He then saw Faye in her beauty and his deep love for her bloomed once again.  
  
As they embraced, their tears fell to the icy ground between them. Mixing together they formed the one word that would grant Spike his freedom:  
  
ETERNITY  
  
Walking hand in hand, they left the grand ice palace behind. Riding the large reindeer back to Copenhagen, the two grew even fonder of each other. And when they finally reached the front gates of their home, they realized they were no longer children but full grown. And as summer bloomed all around them, they held each other close and all knew they would soon be wed.'  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Faye let out a long breath as if she had been holding it in since she started reading. She sat on the cushioned sofa for a moment staring blankly at the page before she blinked and quickly added a mental note:  
  
..::And the ICE Queen Julia melted in Hell.::..  
  
Faye nodded with finality as she closed the book and set it back on the table with a thud.  
  
~~``~~``~~  
  
A.N.: Haha. Me thinks Faye doesn't think much of ol' Jules there.. I am not having pairings in this; it was just in Faye's imagination. In case you haven't realized it yet, this story has no real point. I was just bored and felt like entertaining. Maybe something valuable will come out of it.... I tried to find stories that fit the characters in some way. Jet might be a bit harder since I don't picture him as a reader of children's books. Oh, and I'll probably give Ed a story as well. As if I wasn't going to! I don't have a death wish! (To all Ed fans out there). :P 


	3. Ed's Sled

A.N: Wow, thanks for the reviews, I LOVE reviews! (yeah, that's original). Anyway, here is the one you've all been waiting for: ED! Man, I hope I don't screw this up.  
  
Disclaimer: Guess what! I checked my mailbox today and there it was! The rights to Cowboy Bebop! Hurrah! No, not really. It was just a coupon for Chex Mix.  
  
And a P.S. cuz I love to babble: Did ya' ever notice for the names of the English voice dubbers that "Dave" is also the name for the "Wendy's" spokesperson? You know, Dave Thomas, David Lucas, Wendy's, Wendee...Oh, never mind. I am just a sad little girl....  
  
~~On the Bebop because the Starship Enterprise was taken~~  
  
It was another one of those slow days. Days when Big Shots was on hiatus, days when the VidCom was collecting dust due to a short circuit, days when the ceiling fan becomes the main source of entertainment. Today was one of the days when the ship seemed to find out it had an air conditioning system as if for the first time. It couldn't have been over twenty degrees in the whole ship. The walls of the Bebop had a thin layer of frost coating them as did the windows. Faye had the worst.  
  
"What is up with this damn ship?!" Spike cringed when he heard the shrill cry of a shrew in distress. Faye stomped through the door dressed like an Arctic explorer. She had on every bit of winter wear that could be found on the Bebop. Including, Spike realized with chagrin, his dark pink snow coat.  
  
..::Aw, I was just about to go get that::.. Spike sighed and watched his breath float up to the ceiling.  
  
"Where is Jet?! Isn't it his job to fix these kinds of things?!" Faye flopped down roughly onto the end of the couch opposite of Spike. She drew her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms as far around as far as they would go. It was a rather great feat considering the numerous amount of layers she had on.  
  
..::She looks like the Michelin Man.::.. Spike couldn't help but grin. Big mistake since Faye happened to look at him when he did.  
  
"What is so funny?! And where the hell is Jet?! It's colder than a penguin's ass in here!"  
  
"Jet is right here." The thirty-six year old stepped into the lounge with a scowl on his face, "And I don't appreciate you using that kind of language around Ed."  
  
Both Faye and Spike threw a questioning look back at Jet, but then noticed the little brown foot sticking out from under the middle cushion. Spike and Faye glanced at each other before Spike yelped and jumped up from the wriggling that came from under the spot he was sitting. He yanked the cushion up to find Ed curled up in a ball shivering.  
  
She opened her eyes and blinked a couple times, "Ooooo, Ed can't feel her toes!" She yawned and grabbed the seat back from Spike and recovered herself.  
  
Jet paced over to a chest in the cabinet next to the kitchen and took out a wrench and flashlight. Faye perked up, "Are you going to fix the heating?" Her eyes were wide as saucers.  
  
Jet paused at the doorway, "No, we have a leak in the water pipes as well. And if I don't fix that soon, we'll have our own private skating rink." He sighed, "This ship isn't what it used to be."  
  
Faye sneered, "And what was that? A garbage truck?"  
  
Jet shot a daggered look back at her, "And you two be mindful of Ed. She's been hiding in the strangest places all morning. So you better watch your a-" He remembered his chastisement of Faye and paused, "your keesters."  
  
The circular hatch door shut behind him. Faye scoffed, "'Keesters'? Who says keester?"  
  
She looked hopefully up at Spike waiting for a sign of agreement, but he just glared down at the lump in the couch before thrusting his hands in his pockets and strolling down the hall to his room.  
  
Faye grumbled and stood following Spike's lead.  
  
..::Can't be much colder in my room anyway::..  
  
The click of her boots faded down the corridor and soon the lounge was silent again. But after a minute, the lump under the couch cushion began to shiver. A tuft of red hair poked out from underneath while a honey- colored eye peered about the room. Finally Ed sighed and popped out, hugging the cushion against herself. Her teeth openly chattered as she shot darted glances around the empty chamber. Her eyes fell on the Fairy Tales book resting on the table before her.  
  
Ed, picked it up, sniffed it, chewed on the corner, and finally opened it. She skimmed through the pages trying to find The Snow Queen again, when her eyes fell on the title "The Devil's Gauntlet".  
  
Ein chose this moment to come out from under the couch and sit next to Ed. She held the book so the little dog could see. The picture on the first page was of several large men sitting around a fire. One looked like he was telling a story. He had a scruffy black beard and a round pink nose. His eyes were dark and he wore lots of animal skins.  
  
Ed pointed to the man, "Look Ein, he must be roasty, toasty!" The dog cocked its head and stared up at the girl.  
  
Ed flipped the page and saw the same man on the back of a dog sled. He held a whip in his hand and was yelling at his team of rough-looking, beady and yellow-eyes dogs as they drove on through the harsh snow.  
  
"Oh, la, la, Ein...." Ed trailed off as her gaze went from the picture to the dog sitting next to her. Ein glanced up from the book at Ed and whimpered as her mouth curved to a devilish grin. The dog could almost see the light bulb sparking to life above her head.  
  
~~``~~``~~  
  
Having forgotten his cigarettes back in the lounge, Spike strolled down the hall whistling an old tune. Just as he came to the doorway, a small blur followed by a bigger blur whizzed past him. He could hear the bigger blur yelling, "Come on Ein! We have to make it through or we'll freeze! The wolves are coming! The wolves are coming!"  
  
Spike stood there dumbfounded for a moment before shrugging it off. As he went over to get the cigarette pack on the table, he noticed the opened fairy tale book. The title of the story was The Devil's Gauntlet. Spike flipped the page and saw the picture of the dog sled and driver swinging a whip.  
  
..::Oh, Lord::..  
  
Spike quickly put the book down and set off at a faster than normal stride to find Ed.  
  
~~``~~``~~  
  
"Ma ne me ne ma ne mo,  
  
On we go boys on we go!  
  
Ma ne me ne ma ne mo,  
  
Ma ne me ne ma ne mo!"  
  
Ed, quoting the song that had been in the story, swung a jump rope around and urged Ein to go faster. The poor animal was tied to a bag full of clothes and doohickeys, and Ed's Tomato of course. Ein pulled and pulled but the load was just too heavy.  
  
Ed sighed and dropped the jump rope. She sat there and deliberated the dilemma for a moment; Ein lay on his side panting with his tongue lolling out of his mouth. After a minute, Ed let out a whoop. A startled Ein sprang up and glared at her questioningly.  
  
"No worries, sled woof woof! Ed will lead!" She untied the dog and plucked him up. Setting him on the "sled" she then took the strap and laced it around her hips. Once secured, she tossed a smile back at Ein who managed to let out a whimper just as the sled shot forth and continued its run down the cold halls.  
  
~~``~~``~~  
  
Spike stuck his head out into the revolving corridor before allowing himself to float out. He'd been looking for almost a half hour and found no sign of Ed. That worried him.  
  
..::How is it I can managed to track and bring down some of the toughest scum in the solar system, but can't handle a thirteen year old?::..  
  
He sighed causing a huff of crystallized breath to circle out. He was just relieved none of his old badass syndicate buddies saw him now. Opening another hatch, the bounty hunter continued his search.  
  
~~``~~``~~  
  
Ed had run through practically the entire ship before circulating back to the lounge. There she flopped on the couch and gave herself a much needed rest. Ein jumped up to the seat next to her and licked her face with a whine. Ed reached out and picked up the book again; she flipped through until she found the right story and laid back to read how it ended. Well, not 'read' exactly. More like deduce an ending based on the pictures. It wasn't that she couldn't read; it was just quicker to look at the drawings.  
  
'The sled driver cracked his whip and the dogs ran faster. Glancing back, he saw a hairy wolf chasing him. He ran his sled faster and faster but the wolf got closer. Finally, he stopped the sled and turned to face the wolf on his own.'  
  
Ed, eyes glittering, lowered the book. She turned apprehensively toward the dark doorway then looked at Ein. In a hushed tone, she whispered to the dog, "Oo la la, we are being followed, Ein." She set the book back on the table and picked up the straps of the sled. Pulling the ropes taut as she stood, she proclaimed in a quiet voice, "Ed will fight the big, bad, wolf." Ein whimpered again and hopped down to return to his hiding place under the couch.  
  
~~``~~``~~  
  
Spike hadn't heard anything from Ed for awhile and he'd begun to ponder over his judgment in careers, when he finally decided to give up. That dog had survived falling out of a car of a prominent criminal; he could survive Ed a little longer. Spike paused at that ridiculousness of that last thought.  
  
..::Hmm, maybe I should check the main rooms one more time::.. He then headed for the lounge.  
  
Stepping into the room, Spike found that it was quiet...too quiet. Before he could react, something yelled, "YEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAAAW!" and slammed into his back from above the doorway.  
  
Spike did what any normal person would do in this sort of situation:  
  
"OMYGOSHWHATTHEHELL?! GET IT OFF, GET IT OFF!" Try as he did, he just couldn't shake off the mystery attacker. What made it worse was when the little thing bit his ear. Spike screamed again and fell over. He tripped over Ein who had crawled out momentarily, and flew over the back of the couch.  
  
Slightly dazed, Spike rubbed the back of his head where it had hit the floor. He looked up with bleary vision at his attacker who was now sitting on his chest.  
  
"Ed?"  
  
The girl smiled, "Hello, Spike-person!"  
  
His eyes narrowed and he was about to let her have it, when Faye and Jet chose that moment to come running in the room.  
  
"What the heck is all this screaming about?!" Jet's face had become a rosy red.  
  
He and Faye stared down at the two with great puzzlement before Ed piped up, "Ed fought off the big, bad, wolf chasing poor Ed and Ein!"  
  
To anyone who didn't know Ed, this reply would not have answered their question. But for the other half of the Bebop crew, coming from Ed, it was just fine.  
  
Jet heaved a sigh and turned to go back to his work. Calling over his shoulder, he said, "Be nice, Spike."  
  
After Jet left, Faye looked back down at the two on the floor with a smirk, "'Big, bad, wolf, huh?"  
  
"Don't say a word or I'll kill you," Spike growled through clenched teeth.  
  
But Faye couldn't help herself, "Whoa, down boy. No harm done. Don't make me have to get you tested for rabies."  
  
Spike growled again as Faye strode back to her room laughing.  
  
He glared at Ed who finally realized she was still sitting on him. Leaping up, she snatched Ein into her grasp and held him out before her defensively, "Don't come any closer evil wolf or Edward's guardian woof woof shall devour you!"  
  
Spike rolled his eyes, "Ed, put the dog down. And I am not a wolf!"  
  
Ed's eyes narrowed, "Evil wolf trickery! Ed has the book to prove it!" With that, she darted over to the table and brought the book back to Spike. He skimmed over the last page of the story before glaring at Ed.  
  
"The book says the wolf chasing them wasn't even a wolf. It was the guy's dog who got left behind," Spike grumbled.  
  
Ed's blinked and hugged Ein closer.  
  
Spike read some more, "Yeah, and the dog in the lead of his sled was the actual wolf. When hitching up the dogs to the sled, the guy mistook the wolf for his dog."  
  
When Spike said this, Ed's eyes widened and she stared in disbelief at Ein. In a low voice, she murmured, "So that means....," she set Ein down and backed away from him, "Ed is the wolf!"  
  
Spike smacked his forehead with his hand as Ed howled and galloped off down the corridor.  
  
Once her call disappeared into the bowels of the ship, Spike strode over to the table and retrieved his cigarettes.  
  
On his way past the kitchen, he dropped the book of fairy tales into the trash.  
  
~~``~~``~~  
  
A.N.: hee hee, I guess Spike got fed up with that thing. Oh, well. Oo-de- lally, that was fun. I hope Ed was okay. I never really write fanfiction cuz I find keeping them in character is too hard. (and I ain't very good at it) So anyways, I'll see about continuing with more stories. Jet still needs one right? Eh, maybe not. He's isn't really the imaginative type. :P 


	4. Jet Van Winkle

A.N.: Okay, sorry, I took so long. No, I didn't exactly give up on Jet. I just don't have a good story for him -_-, Yeah, poor Jet. Sorry, pal. So here is one that I feel reflects his thoughts on getting old (he IS almost over the hill). It's is my shortest yet, I believe. An oldy but a goody. Hopefully...  
  
Disclaimer: ZZZzzzzz  
  
P.S.: Once again, this whole Bebopin' story has no real purpose other than to subliminally bring literary culture to the masses. That's right, the MASSES. All my wonderful fans...  
  
~~``~~``~~  
  
"JET!" A yell rang out from down the corridor. The gruff ex-cop grudgingly looked away from the busted pipe he had just finished patching. Setting the wrench down as he stood, he wrung out the front of his work shirt; the water dribbled down into a puddle at his feet.  
  
He stepped out into the hall just as a thin body jumped up and latched itself around his torso. Glaring down at it, Jet growled, "Ed, what the heck are you doin'?" Despite his annoyance, Jet kept a slightly softer tone with Ed than he did the others. It was practically impossible for him to stay mad at the human form of blissful innocence.  
  
Ed gazed up at him with her honey-colored puppy dog eyes (which, Jet was surprised to find, were on the brink of tears). She sniffed as she slid to the metal floor, "Ed cannot find her book."  
  
She whimpered so pitifully, Jet felt he had to help, "What book, Edward?"  
  
Ed sniffed again, "Ed's fairy tale book."  
  
..::Fairy tale? Since when does she read fairy tales?::.. But Jet just shrugged it off, "Where was it last?"  
  
She replied, "The lounge room on the table. But it isn't there!"  
  
"Who was in there last?"  
  
After a moment of pondering, Ed's eyes widened, "Spike-person!" Her eyes took on a slightly murderous gleam as they narrowed to slits. She murmured in a low growl, "Spike-person kidnapped Edward's book."  
  
Jet slapped his hand lightly over his face. ..::Oh, Spike, I never thought you'd sink so low as to take candy from a baby::.. He sighed heavily and headed down the hall to fix yet another problem on the Bebop.  
  
~~``~~``~~  
  
The temperature in the lounge felt cooler than the rest of the ship. The air vent above Jet's head as he passed under it had a distant rattle.  
  
..::Oh, to have one day of laziness::.. Jet's sigh was as heavy as the thud of his boots on the cold metal floor. He was about to head down the corridor to Spike's room when something thick sticking out of the small waste basket next to the stairs caught his eye.  
  
Upon retrieving it from the bin, surprise wasn't the number one feeling when he realized it was the fairy tale book. Ed's apparent fondness for it perked Jet's curiosity and brought him to flipping through the pages as he continued onto Spike's abode. The lunkhead wasn't getting out of trouble for upsetting Ed.  
  
A few titles caught his attention: 'Scarface', 'Peer Gynt', 'The Golden Goose', 'The Little Match Girl'...  
  
..::Hey, 'The King of the Cats', one of my favorites::.. Jet's grim face softened as he let a smile form. ..::I remember a lot of these from my mother telling them::..  
  
Spike's door was closed unsurprisingly, but it didn't matter; Jet walked right by. His thumb flipped the pages as his eyes glittered like a little boy's. They paused on the letter's that spelled: RIP VAN WINKLE.  
  
He read over the first paragraph and into the second:  
  
'Rip was one of those men who was always ready to attend to anybody's business but his own. He would never refuse to assist a neighbor in the roughest work, yet he found it impossible to keep his own house and family in order.'  
  
..::Nice fellow. Reminds me of me...::..  
  
Jet's thoughts were interrupted by the yell of a familiar feminine but tart tempered woman:  
  
"Jet! The hot water isn't fixed yet! I am not going to spend the rest of my life in this giant freezer!"  
  
"She looks sweet and innocent, but man..." Jet grumbled and went on ignoring Faye's shrill call. Her words were beginning to bleed together into a blur. Now all the man heard was a distant yapping and high whirr. It reminded him of a barking Chihuahua and a buzzing kazoo.  
  
His steps carried him past the bathroom and further down the hall towards his room; all the while he read about Rip's wife, Dame Van Winkle. ..::The resemblance is uncanny::.. He chuckled to himself.  
  
'Rip played ninepins with the strange elfish men for hours and drank of their peculiar but delicious ale. Soon his head began to loll and his eyes began to droop. Lying down gently, he relaxed against a large oak and closed his eyes.'  
  
Jet had reached his room and was lying back in his easy chair. He read on through Rip's awakening and bewilderment at the sudden change in surroundings. His beard had grown, his gun had rusted, and his dog was missing. His trip into town was no picnic either. Everything familiar was gone, including his wife and kids. His bones were weary and he didn't even recognize his reflection in the shop windows as he passed them. The townsfolk didn't recognize him except for his daughter who peered into his eyes and saw their once young gleam.  
  
Jet looked up from the book to the mirror sitting on top of his bureau. Hesitantly, he stood and brought his gaze to his likeness in the glass. ..::The years sure do creep up fast, don't they?::.. He scratched his beard and ran his artificial hand over the top of his smooth head. The cold of the metal sent a chill down his neck to his other arm; goosebumps formed. Jet rubbed them back into his skin and turned to his chair.  
  
At that moment, Ed poked her red tufted head around the doorframe and whimpered lightly, "Did Jet save Edward's book?"  
  
Jet quickly glanced up at the voice and smiled, "Yeah, Ed. I found it."  
  
Realizing that he had been indulging himself in a children's book, he sheepishly closed it and handed it back to the excited girl. Ed jumped once and let out a whoop and she spun and ran back down the hall. ..::Glad I can make someone happy around here::..  
  
Jet slumped back in his chair and looked down at his palms. The contrast between flesh and steel became too much and he shut his eyes tight. Leaning back, he opened them again to study the ceiling; his gray blue orbs followed the lines of bolts in the metal.  
  
..::So what now? Does the 'black dog' withdraw to the porch and simply _watch_ cars go by?::.. He scowled ..::Hell, I ain't even forty yet and I'm already talkin' of retirement::.. Disgusted and frustrated, Jet sat up.  
  
..::I used to be one of the most prestigious cops on the force. I must have taken down a hundred felons, all of high rank in the criminal hierarchy. My name struck fear into the hearts of lawbreakers...What happened? My life was wasted away on chasing after the scum of the universe so others could live peaceful and prosperous lives. I guess I forfeited my chance for one::..  
  
Jet became restless and stood to pace around his room ..::Now I'm stuck in this rusted hunk of metal with a bounty hunter with a death wish, a woman who can _hear_ money from a mile away, and a kid...well, a kid who is quite secure in her hyperactive disorder::..  
  
He jumped slightly when Ed poked her head back in the door.  
  
She set her book down on the bureau next to the door. "Are you okay?" For once Ed seemed serious. It took Jet quite by surprise to hear her speak in first person.  
  
He tried to fake a smile for her sake, "Yeah, Ed. I'm okay," she smiled, but her eyes still held concern. Jet realized in that moment, staring into the face of innocence, that he had not wasted his life. He had three "unique children", a "steady paying job" (well, high paying once in a while anyway), and a place to call home. So they didn't live in a mansion on one of the vast estates on Mars. The Bebop had style. And it gave this motley crew a foundation on which to build what they currently were. A family.  
  
Jet strode over to Ed and ruffled her hair, "What do you say we scrounge up some food?" Ed's eyes lit up. Jet glanced around for any other listening ears before leaning closer, "I have a private stash of chips and dip in the storage room."  
  
He put a finger to his lips and Ed took its meaning. Copying him, she slunk stealthily down the hall. Ein suddenly appeared by her feet and followed close behind. Jet sighed again, but this time more contentedly. Just as he was reaching to flick off the light to his room, he noticed that Ed had left her book behind. He reached and picked it up with a glimmer of a smile. ..::I'm a comrade, father, and mother to these people::.. He started to chuckle but was cut short at the realization that Spike was looking over his shoulder.  
  
He jumped, "Geez, what the heck are you tryin' to do?! Scare me to death?!" Spike only grinned. The grin turned to a smirk when he glanced back at the book Jet held.  
  
"Aren't you a little old for that kind of literature, Jet?"  
  
Jet scoffed, "Paugh! You think I'd read this crap?" He tossed it down onto his easy chair and shut the door.  
  
The two strode a little ways down the hall before Jet realized what Spike had said, "Who are you callin' old?!"  
  
~~``~~``~~  
  
A.N.: That's all folks! Yep, no more. The song has been sung. The sun has set. The drink has been drunk. The dog has chewed the chair leg. (This story is done.) Yeah, I ran out of characters..Aww, well. I liked this though. It was fun. But I must admit that I prefer humor a lot more than seriousness. But I find that there was something about each of these chapters that was special, and I am proud nonetheless. Well, until next time, have a nice day. :P 


End file.
